"Can I do this?"
Waking sun.
Important plans this afternoon, questioned, reconsidered.
"Can I do this?"
Family pushing,
Silent voice pulling back,
"Can I do this?"
Autopilot showers, dresses,
Steps fall heavy, body aches.
"Can I do this?"
Consequences pondered.
"I don't think I can do this,"
Pepper my inner debate.
Violent tides surge in both directions,
Weaken me further,
Clearing the way towards certainty.
"I can't do this."
Test the news softly against the backroom air,
We're not going, I whisper, cancelling plans?
Relief responds loudly, tipping the scale.
Daughter's disappointment hits back hard,
Quickly channeled by pretty promises,
Pumpkin carving brings her back.
Settles the air,
Eases my pain,
Home,
"I can do this."
Now far from the edge.
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2 comments:
Poet, Of course you can do it!!!
...as long as I "don't do" plans, free myself with options of canceling visits, and minimize travel at every turn. That's how I survive this treatment.... by letting myself "not do", making that the new image of success, no guilt or sense of failure (easier said than done, I know, believe me!)
ps. I endlessly edit my posts, they run through my head (a weakness maybe, enjoyable, yes). I'm going to work on that poem some more, it needs some tweeking.
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